Q: When is a one-storey house a two-storey house? After a couple minutes, his brother came looking for him and noticed him sexing this goat. History of a Property - Lawyers Jokes. Property Manager: That’s great, I’ll take two of them. Let’s settle this farm style. Jun 13, 2012 - Explore Leiden Law School's board "Legal humor", followed by 171 people on Pinterest. But we're talking about lawyers... PARENTS: Some of the jokes on this site may not be suitable for children.. New jokes tend to be at the top of a category. One time while riding the monorail at Disneyland, I let out the loudest, wettest, deepest and almost foul smelling fart I have ever ripped in my life. Property Manager: That’s great, I’ll take two of them. But sometimes, even straight-laced surveyors, hard-nosed estate agents and ambitious architects need to laugh at themselves. Edit: Wow, I wasn't expecting this to blow up! The lightbulb is in excellent working order and comprised of a beautiful retro teardrop illuminator, offering original glass and metal features and located very centrally in the middle of the room. The police forced the fryers to close down their stall located just outside the mansion, where they had been selling flowers. I don't want to play monopoly with him anymore. 4 years ago. Posted by. It was Trouble's turn to seek, so Shut Up went and ran into his neighbor's yard. Sourced from Reddit, Twitter, and beyond! With enough money you can get inside both of them. ...Bob quickly hopped over the fence and went into Tom's backyard to get his meal, but Tom walks outside and finds Bob trespassing. The farmer thinks the bees are harmless so he makes the prospective buyer a deal: He'll tie the buyer naked to a tree that has a bee hive for an hour, and if any bee stings him, the farmer will GIVE him the land for free, I've suspected for some time now that my wife has been cheating on me. Q: How many quality managers does it take to change a lightbulb? User account menu. Click here for more information. One to hold the bulb, seven to turn the room around the bulb, one to take a picture for the brochure and one to charge you 1.5% commission to cover costs. A: We’ve formed a quality circle to study the problem of why lightbulbs burn out and to determine the best thing we as managers can do to enable lightbulbs to work smarter, not harder. Q: How many building surveyors does it take to change a lightbulb? The letter continues: “I. Q: Why have estate agents stopped looking out of the window in the morning? A: None, because they couldn’t see the value. How many surveyors does it take to change a lightbulb? Q: How many surveyors does it take to change a lightbulb? A huge amount of responsibility rests on the expertise of property professionals to get it right, whether they’re carrying out a Homebuyers’ Report or Structural Survey as part of a property transaction or have been asked to provide a professional property valuation for tax or insurance purposes. There are no words in the English language that can describe the absolute rancidity of this fart. He has read everything he can &, after a few weeks is getting a bit bored. A few are obscene. Q: How many estate agents does it take to change a lightbulb? He had the most expensive equipment money could buy. “Hello, Mr Brown,” says the sales rep, “I’m calling because our company replaced all the windows in your house with our triple-glazed weather-tight windows over a year ago, and you still haven’t sent us a single payment.” A: None! Puzzles, the man asks, “Hey, what about all the other lots?” The realtor looks at him an, The hunter went to retrieve his deer but the farmer said it was his because it was on his property. ", He told the rancher ‘I need to inspect your property for illegally grown drugs.’, A man from the city goes goose hunting one weekend. I promised my friend I would meet him half an hour ago, but I don’t know where I am.”, The man below says: “You’re in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this field between 40 and 41 degrees latitude and 120 and 124 degrees west longitude.”. Along that fence was an old country road where few people drove. Specializing in traffic ticket jokes (that is not a legal definition). Local amenities abound and the property is serviced by a newly refurbished power cord connecting it to the ceiling. to which Shut Up calmly replied, "Shut Up", This ole' country boy invited his cityslicker friend out to the countryside to go hunting. One of the best examples of how ridiculous government paperwork can be is illustrated by a recent case in Louisiana. log in sign up. But, if the police find drugs, they belong to you. A big list of property jokes! Possession of government property is illegal after all. A cemetery caretaker is feeling ill after a long day's work and decides to head into town to get some medicine before going to bed. A: Four. When his friend arrives, the country boy tells him, "We'll head out to my uncle James' place. See more ideas about lawyer jokes… Being a property expert is no laughing matter. A man is flying in a hot air balloon and realises he is lost. He's got a big spread and won't mind if we do some hunting on it.". This lawyer had heard about the exceptional duck hunting in lower Alabama so he made plans to go one year. After selling his sole for a small plaice perched by the sea (something to the tuna 500 square feet), he found something fishy within contract and realised he cod do better if he weren't such a cheap-skate. The German said "yes I see it." He found love, got married and had a son. A: Six! As an innovative property news hub, the website aims to help buy-to-let investors, landlords as well as home owners to do better from their investment and we do that through informative and insightful article content provided by the industry experts. Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. On the second day he finally is able to hit one. A judge was interviewing a woman regarding her pending, An Irishman is selling his property to a German. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. I guess my property line isn't where I thought it was. He is a pretty bad hunter so he doesn‘t hit anything for a long time. My friend told me how electricity is measured and I was like Watt! A big city lawyer went duck hunting in rural North Cowra. Q: How many estate agents does it take to change a lightbulb? because I'm about to pump my liquid assets into you. A: You’ve gotta get some boundaries! Whether you’re guilty or innocent, our law puns, legal puns and law school jokes will make you laugh even in court. (Another ending is they're both property), St. Peter tells him "You have a choice of going to heaven or to hell and I suggest you check them both out before deciding.
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