He... Mischievous medical student. Don’t leave me hangin’ here”. Cauterize: Made eye contact with her AIMS Education provides training for some of the most in-demand healthcare professions. Cannot exclude a pterodactyl at this point. The patient has no previous history of suicides. Having the proper resources to conduct a successful job search can make a big difference. – God doesn’t think he’s a doctor.” Medical Resident Puns “Some residents say they don’t really like peds that much. After the tremendous noise ceases, the intern uncovers his ears and shouts, "What the hell was that?" The professor dip his finger in urine & tasted it in his own mouth. The doctor walks into the exam room shadowed by a medical student. He was stiff-legged and walking slowly. It is the first day of medical school, and the doctor in charge of the new class has all the new students gather in the main lecture hall for the orientation. Patient was seen in consultation by Dr. Jones, who felt we should sit on the abdomen and I agree. A group of people surround the riverbank where the young man was floating. "The saying, 'There's more pleasure in giving than in receiving,' applies chiefly to advice... and medicine." Needless to say, he failed. It’s been awhile since I’ve had a fun, lighthearted post. Thorax: A Dr. Seuss character 1. Confused, he asked the teacher why his score was so high. Discharge status: Alive, but without my permission. Short Jokes Anyone Can Remember. My top 10 favorite clean medical jokes. She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was hot in bed last night. ER: The things on your head that you hear with, Genes: Blue denim slacks It may be a duck, pheasant, or quail. They rub it and a Genie comes out in a puff of smoke. – That’s fine. He tells them 'It is important to be comfortable with the cadaver'. ", Patient: “They just kept kung fu-ing the door and I kept telling them to stop.” Tumor: More than one, an extra pair, Varicose: Near by/close by Pathalogical: A reasonable way to go Carol Yepes/ Getty Images. She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life until she got a divorce. “Well”, said the teacher, “The first part was taking the engine apart and you did that perfectly, so you got 50%. A notorious student in medical college was up to his usual tricks. Having entered mechanic school, the former physician received the results of his first test back with a score of 200%. After some discussion, the plastic surgeons decided to use the foreskin from his circumcision for his new eyelids. Patient has two teenage children, but no other abnormalities. One afternoon, a man went to his doctor and told him that he hasn't been feeling well lately. When I introduced myself as the on-call neurologist, the very southern-sounding nurse loudly exclaimed: "Neurology? A medical student sees a female patient with a distended stomach and says "Gee I wonder what that patient has". If you'd like to enjoy some more medical humor, one liners and funny hospital jokes, be sure to check out our collection of medical puns. Patient:“Yes, I thought they were gonna wreck my door!” ", Here's the backstory: "I work in a medical clinic and I have a little fun with a patient one day when she complains her kids keep 'kung fu-ing' her front door. Are you even a med student unless you tell everyone you’re a med student? The real tragedy is the moral death which, in different forms, overtakes so many good fellows. Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Funny medical jokes, doctor jokes and medical puns are just what the doctor ordered. I think that it was probably a duck. The male doctor asks her to dinner and she accepts. Click here for more information. Seizure: Roman Emperor, Terminal Illness: Getting sick at the airport. Warm Up Round: 5 Short and Funny Medical Jokes Packed with tips from NPs who have been through it all, download our FREE eBook for current & prospective NP students seeking insight into everything you need to know before, during, and after NP school. One treats what you have, the other thinks you have what he treats. On the second day the knee was better and on the third day it disappeared. Download Free “As a doctor, you’ll need to develop two key skills,” the professor begins. Figuring this was fairly unusual, he pulled the cork out, and to his surprise, music began pla. MEDICAL HUMOR “Studying in medical school is like having sex while you are drunk. Vein : Conceited. As part of the training, the chief doctor decided to bring the student around to all the patients in his wing so the student could see firsthand some of th. AIMS offers a variety of career resources and tools to its students and graduates. Then he asked the students to do the same. So I did an exhausted search (not really) for medical jokes and came up with the following 10 from the internet and what I’ve heard. Pharmacist: Person who makes a living dealing in agriculture Me: “Oh, so, everybody was kung fu fighting?”, Patient: “Yes, and I told them to just swing at the air, not hit the door.” An intern sees the same patient and says "that patient has cirrhosis", the third year resident sees the same patient and says, "that patient is pregnant". It’s totally natural and understandable to be nervous before a doctor’s visit. Taking his place in front of the group, he starts his speech. ", The IT student creates a program that does it for him, the law student asks whether the assignment is legal and the medical student asks „When is it due?“, getting a little practice in before the final exams. Me: “Were they fast as lightning?”, Patient: “No, and it was scary, I thought they were gonna wreck my door.” This time, he went to his professor, but his professor was ready for him. Medical School Jokes. Post Operative: A letter carrier, Recovery Room: Place to do upholstery Barium: What doctors do when patients die. It had been a long time—seven years to be exact—since my friend Brian had been to see his doctor. 2. You can’t be disgusted by anything involving the human body.” The professor then rolls the body over, sticks his finger into the corpse’s butt, withdraws it and sticks his finger in his mouth. The engineer whips out his slide rule (so it's old) and shuffles it back and forth, and finally announces "3.99". He went over to a table where a body was lying face down. Allow me to demonstrate" The lecturer brings a cadaver into the lecture theatre, One asks the other, "What do you think it'll be like?". Whether you're a doctor, nurse, medical or healthcare student, or another member of the healthcare force... you're going to laugh your socks off with these funny medical jokes. Pelvis: Second cousin to Elvis Check out these Medical Jokes About Doctors. ... A medical student was told to remove the spleen from a cadaver. Enjoy our funny medical jokes and puns. Rectum: Almost killed him You never actually finish, you just keep going until it’s not worth it anymore.” "Medical school is like trying to eat five pancakes every morning for breakfast. Medical Jokes and Puns. Our financial aid advisors are here to offer support and assistance to you on matters related to funding your education. A Ph.D. student, a post-doc, and their professor are walking through a city park and they find an antique oil lamp. Patient has left her white blood cells at another hospital. Medical Patient Joke. Our goal is to see every student enjoy a successful career in the healthcare field. An intern sees the same patient and says "that patient has cirrhosis", the third year resident sees the same patient and says, "that patient is pregnant". The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993. ... A medical student was told to remove the spleen from a cadaver. Morbid: A higher offer than I bid, Organ Transplant: What you do to your piano when you move Possible flying squirrel. These are his answers: Antibody - against everyone Artery - the study of painting Bacteria - back door to a cafeteria Caesarean section - a district in Rome Cat scan - searching for a lost kitty The attending sees the same patient and says "Gee, I wonder what that patient has". dad jokes 1 doctor 27 doctor humor 1 doctor jokes 1 doctors day 3 jokes 1 medical humor 3 medical jokes 1 one-liners 1. Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation. Twitter Facebook LinkedIn Email Published on 22nd January 2020 by Roya. Students in our CAAHEP accredited Neurodiagnostic technologist program learn how to record and study electrical activity in the brain and nervous system. Medical School, Humor, and the Hidden Curriculum. I got the wrong end! Coma: A punctuation mark. Me: “I bet it was a little bit frightening.”. Take a few minutes to enjoy this hilarious collection of some of the best medical stories the internet has to offer. Realizing this was not the most riveting subject, the professor decided to lighten the mood slightly.
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